Suit Lapels: What Type is Right For You?

Lapels are an often overlooked feature of a suit, but are a critical consideration if you want a jacket that is going to look good for your frame and fit your style.  Most often, men don't know how to match their lapels to their ties and end up looking out of proportion.  In this article I'll go over the three most common lapel types, how to wear them and which one is best for you.

The Notch Lapel

The most common lapel you will see is the notch lapel. Working well for almost all suit types, the notch lapel is the most versatile choice for your suit jacket lapels. Keep it in mind when you are making your first suit purchase, it will serve you well in almost all situations (also, your first suit should be navy as well. More on that in this article.)

Classic Peak Lapel from Beckett & Robb

The Peak Lapel

Most commonly seen on double-breasted jackets and dinner jackets, the peak lapel stands out more from the notch lapel but is still appropriate for almost all occasions.  You should note, however, that the peak lapel is starting to make appearances on single-breasted jackets.  I would recommend it only for those with a more fashion forward style, it takes a certain amount of confidence to pull off.

Kobe rocking a stylish Peak Lapel in GQ.

The Shawl Lapel

You might recognize this lapel from informal apparel such as robes, but is a great choice for a tuxedo.  The shawl lapel was first used in Victorian Smoking Jackets and has been adapted for suiting.  Wearing a shawl lapel anywhere but on a tux is not recommended unless you are very confident in your look and are wearing it somewhere less formal than a business setting.  In that case, go for it.

Band of Outsiders Shawl Collar Tux

How to Pick a Lapel

Rather than explain this process to you, I've got a handy flow chart to solve your lapel problems.  Follow the guide and you'll know which style is best for you in no time.

Try to keep in mind when deciding on a lapel style that your lapels should be about the same width as your ties.  Many designers are leaning towards slimmer lapels in recent years, however designers like Tom Ford are designing jackets with wide lapels as well.  I tend to lean toward slimmer lapels, especially with notch and shawl lapels.  Peak lapels will always need to be slightly wider however they do not need to be oversized.

Thanks for reading.  As always, be dapper.

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Hit the Bar: Tie Bars and How to Wear Them

If you're knotting up for any occasion, I highly recommend that you dress up your tie a bit. You may have used a tie pin before, and while there are many fine tie pins on the market, a tie bar is an undeniably more sophisticated look than the pin.  The bar is both functional and aesthetic, holding your tie back from flying all over the place but also breaking up the silhouette of your tie.  Today I'd like to give you some recommendations on what kind of tie bar you should buy and how you should wear it.

Keep it Simple, Stupid

There are thousands of tie bars on the market, plenty of them having embellishments from sports team logos to diamonds.  I recommend keeping yours fairly toned down.  That doesn't mean you can't get something to set your tie bar apart from others, there are a great variety of tie bars with different finishes, subtle striping, textures and so on.  Bottom line is that you should look for something that won't overpower your tie.

Calvin Klein Skinny Tie with Tie Bar

Bigger isn't Always Better

One tie bar isn't going to work for every tie in your ensemble, sorry it's just not going to happen.  Get one too short and you're going to look you misused a paper clip, too long and it will look like you put your pen on your tie.  I like to think that a tie bar should extend across your tie anywhere from halfway to 3/4 of the width of the tie where you are clipping it.  For skinny ties, a one inch tie bar will be perfect for most situations.  For standard width ties, I would recommend getting out to 2 inches.  See below how Jake Gyllenhaal rocks the one inch tie bar perfectly with a skinny tie.

Jake Gyllenhaal on GQ's May 2010 Cover

Where to Wear It

There really is no standard in my opinion of where to put your tie bar, but Glenn O'Brien from GQ has put it best: "Think of it as the needle on a meter or the mercury in a thermometer. Imagine the tie knot as the top of the scale, which we shall call 'ridiculous,' and the bottom of the tie as the bottom of the scale, which we shall call 'stolid.' Measure bar wearers accordingly."  I don't think much more needs to be said here.  With that, clink on the link below and head to TheTieBar.com to get your next tie bar, they have great stuff and most of it is reasonably priced.

TheTieBar.com

Feel free to experiment with different colors on your tie bars. Silver will be the most versatile choice, but you can find gold, black or white tie bars that will work with select colors and patterns. Even some bolder colors might be appropriate if you're looking to make a splash, just keep in mind that you don't want the tie bar to overpower the rest of your ensemble. Are you already wearing a tie bar? Do you have one that you love? Let me know!

Thanks for reading. As always, be dapper.

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Dress Up Your Wrist with a Classic Watch

I love watches, but I'm pretty convinced that most guys are under the impression that a watch needs to be gigantic to look good.  How wrong they are, slimmed down watches are a classic look and should be a part of any man's ensemble.  I know that watches really aren't a necessity anymore, your cellphone is your time keeper and nothing is going to change that.  However they still look great with a suit and give you an added touch of sophistication.  I'll go over some things to keep in mind for your next watch in this article and where you can find them.

Ditch the Metal Band, You Want Leather

Wearing a watch with a metal band is a little like having a car that is all chrome, it's just too much. Leather helps balance out the metal accents of your watch and is much more understated. I recommend at least having two bands you can switch between (if not two watches) for black and brown leather. Match them to your shoes if you can. Also, keep the band slim, you're not trying to look like a rockstar. Below is an excellent example from Timex.

Timex Easy Reader

You Don't Need 15 Dials

Too many watches have crowded faces, which simply makes them look busy. You don't need to know what time it is in Cairo, you don't need to time your walk to the bathroom and you really don't even need the date (this one I'll accept if it's the only other thing on the face.) Bottom line: keep it clean and minimal. It will draw less attention to the watch and you are wearing a watch as an accent piece, not the focal point of your wardrobe. This watch from Calvin Klein shows off how to keep your timepiece simple.

Calvin Klein Concept Strap Watch

Keep the Case Slim

Once again, your watch is an accent piece, having it stick out an inch from your wrist doesn't really accomplish that. Also, it's going to get in the way if your watch face is gigantic and you'll end up taking it off by the end of the day. If you have any doubts, try it on with your suit jacket. Does it slip into the sleeve or make it bunch up around your wrist? If you're struggling to get your jacket back around the watch, it's too big.  The Bulova watch below is slim enough to make sure you show your watch when you want to, not all the time.

Bulova Men's Dress Watch

One of the great things about getting a slim leather banded watch is that it is so versatile. It's going to look great with your suit, and if you want to dress it down you can pick up a nylon strap with some color for less than $30. Do you have a great watch that you love to wear? If so I'd love to see it, shoot some pictures to bedapper@blogspot.com and you might be featured in a future article.

Thanks for reading. As always, be dapper.

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How to Act and Look Like a Man When You Lose

I've decided to take today's blog in a bit of a different direction today, hopefully you enjoy reading this blog as much as I have enjoyed writing it.

We as men can be the best dressed dude in the room, have perfectly shined shoes, a neat shave and a great haircut, but it doesn't mean anything unless you're prepared to act like a man.  I was watching the Heat collapse to the Dallas Mavericks last night in the NBA Finals and was blown away when LeBron James, an idol and role model to many of today's young men, walked off the court without so much as a handshake with his opponents.  He then proceeded to carry on a hostile press conference after the game addressing his "haters" and how they are going to have to "get back to the real world" at some point.

I'll give Mr. James this, yes 90% of us got up this morning and went back to the office.  He probably got on a private jet to a vacation.  But at least those of us who are headed back to the real world are (hopefully) doing it with pride and respect, for ourselves and for those around us.  I don't think the same can be said for LBJ.  With that said, maybe LeBron will catch a glimpse of this blog and take a note for the next time he loses a game, series or championship.

Nathaniel S. Butler/NBAE/Getty Images

Don't Make Excuses

Want to look like a child as quickly as possible? Make a list of excuses for why you lost before you even show up. Everyone will inevitably lose at something in life; whether it is not getting a promotion, getting dumped by your dream girl, crashing your car, whatever.  We will all lose eventually.  Making excuses doesn't make it look like something wasn't your fault or that you're a victim.  It makes you look like you don't take responsibility for yourself or your actions.  It also makes you look weak, because you can't stay in control.  It's easy to do too, we all want to insulate ourselves from criticism.  I've done it before and I'm sure you have too.  So next time you lose, try this: don't make one excuse.  Not one.  Own it.  When you have some time to yourself, think about the situation and try to decide what was in your control and what wasn't.  Could you have handled yourself differently?  Could you have made something in your control that wasn't?  And if something was out of your control, stop trying to make an excuse about it.  Everyone has things in their life that are out of their control, and the more you try to control them the more they will control you.  So next time you lose, man up and shut up.

Don't Attack Your Opposition

Want to look incredibly petty with efficiency? Start attacking your opposition, especially personally, and you're right on track.  You know that guy who starts up on how "bullshit" or "cheap" the other team was when he loses a pickup basketball game?  You don't want to be him.  Why?  Because when he loses, he looks like an ass.  When he wins, he's an even bigger ass.  Because even if he shakes the other team's hands after he wins, it's not genuine.   If he just walks off the court, everyone else is glad he's gone.  I'm not saying you need to be ecstatic if you lose, but you should lose with class.  However, if you are humble and respectful when you lose, eventually you will win.  And people will want to celebrate that win with you.

Great sportsmanship, and Federer is a sharp dresser.  Nadal, not so much.

Don't Keep Losing

Want to look unbelievably pathetic? Make the same mistake over and over and over.  This is especially critical in your professional life, nothing will agitate a manager more than seeing you make the same mistakes every day, week or month.  You'll never see a raise, promotion or even congratulations from your boss because it shows that you have no idea how to improve.  So, if you are constantly seeing the same results or outcome from something you do, it's time to sit down and find out why. And keep in mind the first two points here when you do think about that.  Don't worry about the things that were out of your control.  Worry about what you can control and what you can do differently or better.  Write them down.  Put it on your bathroom mirror so you see those things every day.  Seriously, writing it down is a mental commitment.  It helps your recall incredibly and you can focus through the day on those things more effectively.  I'm not going to make guarantees here, I'm not trying to sell you self help or anything, but I've seen personal improvement from this method on countless occasions and I eventually stopped losing in those situations.  I hope you'll stop losing too.

This article deviates from my normal topics, but I think that acting like a man is just as important as the way we dress.  Plus, even if you're not a father, you have young people looking up to you.  They will emulate the way you act, speak and dress.  We should show them the best.  If you'd like more articles like this, please let me know, but I promise I'll be back to talking style for at least the rest of the week!

Thanks for reading.  As always, be dapper.

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